


Smoke Bomb

by Luna_Roe



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Adult Themes, Crush, Dubious Consent, F/M, Graphic, I suck at tags, Lust Potion/Spell, Mention of Assualt, Romance, Slight Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Smut, Unrequited Love, lust potion, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:13:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28848123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Roe/pseuds/Luna_Roe
Summary: What happens when a smoke bomb goes off and it effects a certain Captain? Will our main character give in or resist?
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Original Female Character(s), Steve Rogers/Reader
Kudos: 17





	1. How it Began

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all,
> 
> So, I got this idea in my head a couple days ago and could NOT stop thinking about it. The main character has abilities based of those in The Old Guard on Netflix. So if you haven't watched that then don't read this fic.  
> The story is set after Infinity War in a slight canon divergence that is made quite obvious once you start reading.  
> I hope you like it! As always, I thrive off comments and kudos. Let me know what you thought about the fic. I'd love to chat with you in the comments!
> 
> Love,  
> Luna

~~

There was one thing about being different and that was that it put a target on your back. For me, being able to regenerate my body no matter the wound – not that I had tested my head being cut off – was something that had kept me on far too many organizations’ radars. Governments wanted to study me. Private organizations wanted to replicate me. So, I was taught to hide. Pretend I was afraid to get hurt because I hated pain. Be proper and prim, that way no one would find out my secret. It served me well through the years; and I do mean years. I was nearing 200 years old. I stopped aging some time in 1840. I don’t exactly keep tally of my age anymore. With no one left from my family, there wasn’t a point. I never stayed in one spot long enough to make friends either. I had met a few people like me. But sticking around one another for too long tended to raise more alarms than when we were solo. We agreed to meet up every couple decades or so to check in. Other than that, no contact for our safety.

So, when Nick Fury personally came to and asked me to join his team of misfits I was confused. More than that, I was terrified. I had successfully hidden from those that would cage me for so long. Now, the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. was asking me to join his team. He had been so gentle, easing me into the reality that he and his organization had been the true reason I was able to hide for so long. In the end I agreed to meet the team, feel things out by going on one mission with them.

And that, ladies and gents, is how I found myself on a mission with the Avengers that turned out to be an ambush. Bruce wasn’t doing that well, having been seriously injured and Hulk refused to come to the rescue. Tony was in the air providing cover for those of the team that were running for the bird that had come to pick us up. Nat and Clint were at the helicopter as Captain America was downing enemies with his ricochet shield.

“Kid, go.” Bruce said to me, attempting to push me towards the helicopter. There was an opening and he wanted me to take it.

Inhaling slowly, I announced, “Not without you. Stay behind me.” I hoisted the man to his feet, earning a pained groan from him. I felt him drape his good arm over my shoulders for support. With a nod from him I began rushing us towards our safety net. Nat noticed and shot enemies as they appeared. Fifty feet to go.

Forty.

Thirty.

Twenty.

I saw someone rushing from the opposite side of Bruce. We were in the way; Natasha couldn’t shoot him. There wasn’t much time to decide on what to do. Dipping my head and spinning myself around to shield Bruce’s back from the attacker, I used my foot to shove the doctor towards Natasha and safety. As I did so, I heard Natasha, Bruce, and Captain America scream out “NO!” The attacker raised his weapon and squeezed the trigger before I could raise my own weapon. The world went dark.

~~

_Helicopter returning to the Avengers Tower._

Every single time the first sense to return is touch. I could feel the agonizing pain at each bullet wound my body sustained. I could feel the nerves screaming in response. Pain was the first thing to return, the thing that woke me back up every time.

Then, past the pain, I could feel others touching me. One set of hands was assessing me. Another was holding me. The set holding me were strong and protective, yet gentle. The set assessing me – my wounds – were trembling. There was worry in them. Adrenaline and fear prevented them from being steady and sure as they worked.

Next was hearing. Hearing was the second sense to return. I could hear voices arguing. A woman was pissed. A man was recapping, trying to find where things went wrong. Another was speaking about my wounds – must be the man with the shaky hands. Another man was calling out to me. Not my name, but he was calling out to me. I kept hearing that voice call out, “Agent, wake up.”

My vocal cords were next to return. My vocal cords let out a pained groan. My eyesight returned as I opened my eyes. Once the lights no longer blinded my eyes, I took in the sight of Captain America holding me in his lap, one arm supporting my torso – my head resting in the crook of his arm – and his free hand keeping pressure on the bullet wound right under my left breast. The proximity of his hand to my breast meant he was pressing it upwards as a result of keeping pressure on the wound.

I couldn’t help it. Cracking a smile, I said hoarsely, “Captain, you barely know me.”

He blinked a couple times, processing the fact I had opened my eyes and spoken to him. Then his eyes darted to his hand and back to my face. I watched as his angelic face broke into a smile and he said, “How about dinner?”

I moved my hand to his arm, resting it there more than anything else, “That’d be nice.” I fell asleep to the Avengers laughter at the whole situation.

~~

_Avengers’ Compound_

I had been taken to the infirmary as soon as we landed. I barely remembered Captain America carrying me bridal style to be seen by their physician. When I woke again, I was alone sans the physician in the infirmary. He had, clearly, been fully informed of my ability. He smiled as I swung my legs over the side of the bed, “Miss Rawlins, would you be willing to answer some questions?”

I knew what his questions would be. I, also, knew that I didn’t have the answers he wanted. “What do you want to know?”

“How long have you been able to regenerate like this?” He started with.

I stretched the death out of my bones, loosening the stiffened joints, “As long as I can remember. Not that I tested it out as a child.”

He nodded and jotted down my answer before looking at me again and asking, “What type of wounds can you heal from?”

I shrugged, eyebrow raising as I thought it through, “I’ve been shot, obviously. My arm was nearly severed when I was younger. That healed. My legs have been crushed. That healed. I’ve healed from every wound I’ve ever sustained.” The next two questions I knew already. But, out of politeness, I waited for him to ask them.

“Do you age?” He asked, curiosity bounding through him now.

I stood from the bed, stretching further, “Stopped showing signs of aging when I was twenty.”

The doc jotted notes and thought it over. The wheels began to turn as he realized there was a lack of information in the file he had. His face paled a bit as he looked up slowly, “Ma’am, how old are you?”

I turned to look at him straight on, “Old.” I grabbed my jacket and slung it on before heading out of the infirmary. I wanted to go home. I wanted to find a way to fall off the face of the earth for a few decades so I could safely resurface with a new identity.

I was just about to the elevator that would take me to the main lobby and, subsequently, to my freedom when a forceful hand grabbed my hair and started to drag me through the compound. I kicked and yelled, scratched and pulled. Nothing worked. I couldn’t get a good purchase on anything enough to stop the abductor.

I was dragged by my hair all the way to the common area the Avenger’s had. They were already there, being held hostage while the ringleader spoke to them. He was demanding something of them. I didn’t know what it was, the hair pulling was a bit distracting.

As the leader – the one that wouldn’t shut up – noticed my presence, my abductor used their leverage to fling me to the middle of the room. From the faces I saw as I rolled to a stop, the Avengers were shocked I was awake, let alone alive. A gun was aimed at my head.

“Tell me what I want to know, and I spare the girl.” He menacingly said. And I couldn’t stop the snort that came from me.

I righted myself, moving to stand with the rest of the room, “Spare the girl? Son, do you have any idea how old I am?” That must have pissed the man off since he lowered his aim and shot me in the thigh.

I groaned in pain and cursed under my breath, “That wasn’t very nice.” In a few seconds the bullet plopped on the ground and the now visible skin was knitted back together – good as new. The shocked expression of the man that had shot me and his friends close enough to see was humorous to say the least. I took a step towards him, causing him to shoot again. Again, the same thing happened.

“Get away from me… get away you freak!” He screamed as he ordered his men to shoot me. I needed their attention fully on me to give the rest of the Avengers the opening to stop them. Which meant, I had a minimum of six guns unload their entire magazine into me. I dropped to the floor in a puddle of my own blood as the world went dark.

None took a good enough shot, so I woke rather quickly. By the time I did wake, the attackers were apprehended and once again Captain America was there calling for me to wake up. “Agent come back. Agent, wake up.”

I blinked and groaned, letting him know I was back. As I sat up, I spat out a bullet. “Things always this exciting for you guys?” I asked as I sat back on my feet, hands on my thighs. I would need new clothes now.

“Agent, how?” Captain America asked, utterly confused yet thankful that his teammate hadn’t died.

I sighed and answered, “It’s a confusing story with more questions than answers. But I’ll tell you what I know.” And with his help, I sat up on the couch after the attacker were led away and I told them my story.

~~


	2. The New Development

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some days things go well, some days they don't. This was one of the don't kind of days.

~~

That’s how it all started. Ever since I had been a part of the team; given my own room and everything. I trained with Clint and Nat when they weren’t on missions. I tended to help feed the lot that stayed at the Tower – I loved to cook and had the most experience by far. Things were nice and I had grown quite close to Bucky once he joined the team as well.

The one thing I hadn’t anticipated was the feelings that began to grow in me. I had started to fall for a certain Captain, and that terrified me. I was mortal, that I knew. But my regenerative properties, obviously, meant I had a prolonged life. A substantially prolonged life. That was why I didn’t have a family. When my parents passed that was it. I was too fearful of having a family of my own. I didn’t want to bury my own children or curse them with the same abilities as me. So, I avoided relationships. But now, well, now I was faced with the reality that I loved Steve Rogers.

Maybe it had been how we worked so closely. Maybe it was how old he was too – though his age was due to being frozen. Maybe it was that we were both, quite literally, old souls. Maybe it was that our personalities were a match. Maybe it was as simple as his pheromones sent my ovaries into overdrive. Whatever the cause, I was stuck with the utter pain that came with loving someone that would die before me.

I decided, as soon as I recognized that I loved Steve, that I would not tell him. I’d let the feelings simmer down to a point where I could live with the possibility of him settling down. The heartache that would follow would be too much when one day I’d see my love buried. No, it was best I do nothing about those damn feelings that had formed without my express permission.

Besides, there was no indication that he felt anything for me other than respect as his teammate. He never even called me by my name. Just Agent or Rawlins. He kept me at a distance, which was helpful. The distance was a starting point for getting my feelings under control. It told me he didn’t reciprocate these damn feelings. That was helpful in forcing myself to not say anything and not pursue the one thing I had forbidden myself for years.

~~

_Two Years Later_

Since I joined the team, we had been tasked with infiltration of an organization to gain information. They weren’t named, to our knowledge, but they were acting fast. Our sources told us they were working on some sort of drug or chemical that would help with human trafficking. They needed it to run more women on the black market so they could fund whatever it was they were planning. What we had yet to find was that if it was meant for the women to keep them in line easier or if it was for the clients to ‘perform’ better.

It was easy, however, to waltz into the locations that this unnamed organization had though. They valued pretty women, jotting down the descriptions of any woman they saw that fit the type they needed to sell. Nat had gone a couple times with Bruce or Tony – acting as their assistant. It got them in the door every time. Wanda went once with similar results. More often than not, though, I went. When Bruce was the one that went, especially, since I can regenerate from a bullet wound to the head and he can’t.

Two years of tracking the possible drug and we were so close. It was just a matter of time before we found the actual lab. Time was the issue, though. Our intel indicated that they were about to launch whatever the chemical was. We were racing to find the lab before they went live with it.

Bruce was looking at the latest data that had been nicked off a computer at one of the buildings we infiltrated. It must have been extremely useful data since he had begun humming. He did that when he was interested in whatever he was reading. I, myself, was going over some of the older data we had gotten our hands on. Just in case we missed something or perhaps all the data together would connect some sort of dot.

“Rawlins, I need you on this mission.” Captain America announced as I gave up on finding some sort of connection between the data sets. I nodded and followed him. In the time I had been with the team I had grown to care for them all. But the one person I wanted to be close with, the one person I had grown to love, was the one person on the team that kept me at a safe distance. And that person was the man leading me to the conference room to talk mission.

It took him a year to call me Rawlins. It took him six more months to finally use Rawlins more than ‘Agent’. I would take what I could get. Not that I could blame him. Being romantically involved with a team member meant danger. Excess danger that is unnecessary. And I was content with my imagination late at night.

“Morgan!” Came Bucky’s voice as soon as he saw me. He came rushing, happy to see his friend. I was closest with Bucky. He was the one that trained me in hand-to-hand. Not that I needed it. But the new tactics had proven useful. I suppose the fact that I was older than Bucky or Captain America made it easier for us to bond.

“Hey Bucky,” I said in return. My arms easily wrapped around his neck, causing me to stand on my tiptoes just to reach him. His massive arms wrapped around my body with ease and picked me up. “When did you get back?” He had been gone on a mission to hunt down Hydra agents hiding in the arctic.

“Last night. Finally thawed out from the arctic winds.” He set me back down and pecked my temple before giving Cap a hug and headed for the kitchen for a well-deserved meal.

If I hadn’t known better, I would have sworn I saw a twinge of jealousy in the Captain’s eyes. There was no way that was possible. He was too distant for that. We continued towards the conference room. Per our usual routine, I plopped in the chair closest the projector with the best view of the city out the window as he sat opposite me.

“Okay, what’s the mission?” I asked as I gave the man before me – the insanely gorgeous man – my undivided attention.

“We need to infiltrate this facility to copy the data on their hard drives.” He stated as he pulled up the blueprints and pointed the route we would take. He explained that there was a possibility that there was chemical experimentation going on with the intent to distribute to the masses.

I nodded, jotted notes for my own prep, and asked, “Think we’ll find the chemical this time?”

“Unsure, but any information is useful to us. If we do find the chemical this time, we will stop it.” After a couple of minutes of silence, he added, “Your primary duty will be to protect Dr. Banner. He had been having difficulty transforming lately.”

I nodded, “Bullet sponge, got it.” Once again, if I hadn’t known better, it looked like Cap was hurt by my comment. “When do we start?” I asked, feeling the need to say something since _The_ Captain America was staring at me so intently.

He blinked and cleared his throat, “Uh, yes. We start tomorrow, 0700.”

I nodded and excused myself. I found myself heating up under the intense gaze he had given me. I needed a cold shower and some time with the hand nozzle. THe man was unfair with how attractive he was! Did he know it? Was he aware what he did to me? The kind of feelings and urges he produces in me? There is no way. If he did… maybe he would do something about it. Something like picking me up and carrying me to his bed. Taking me on the balcony with the city bustling below. Or join me in the showers in the gym. He would have done something, maybe, if he knew how badly I wanted him.

As I entered my room and shut the door, I muttered to myself, “Come on Mo… you know you can’t….”

~~

_Next Day 0700_

We were heading for the location. I was heading in with Bruce as his assistant. The type of building we were going to was professional with one weakness. A pretty girl on a man’s arm was a better ticket in than actual credentials. So, I was Bruce’s assistant. I held his briefcase and wore a very tight skirt with stiletto heels. My top was a cropped blazer with a green laced teddy underneath. Sure enough, we were in without so much as a glance at Bruce’s credentials.

Cap was to find his way in without being seen. He would be the main muscle if we ran into trouble. I wanted to be on his arm, though. I wished he had been the IT guy with the scantily dressed assistant. I wished that I was hanging off his arm instead of Bruce’s. Not that Dr. Banner wasn’t an attractive man. He was. To an unfair level. But my heart could only handle loving one man, and my ovaries could only handle lusting after one man. I didn’t have the energy for more.

We made our way to the room we needed. It was easy. No one was paying attention to us past staring at my ass or tits.

With the door closed behind us, I turned to Bruce and asked, “What do you need me to do?”

He smiled and said, “Just be ready if I accidentally trip the alarms.” He chuckled when I hiked up my skirt to reveal my concealed firearm. With a swift movement I unholstered it and stood at the ready facing the door. “Of course, you came prepared.”

I smirked, “What kind of assistant would I be if I weren’t prepared?”

From the window across the room we heard a soft tap. It was Cap. I moved to unlock the window for him. He smiled at me, but his eyes lingered on the part of my skirt that was still bunched above the holster on my thigh. I shot him a wink and went back to my place at the door. “Hurry Bruce, these heels are killing me.”

“I’ll do my best, Morgan.” He chuckled after me.

Cap headed to the adjoining room to clear it for us. Three seconds later we heard a bomb go off in the adjoining room. I wanted to rush to see if Steve was alright, but hesitated. My job on this mission was to cover Bruce.

“Go, I’m fine!” Bruce told me. I was off in no time. But, the door slammed shut before I could get in there.

“CAP!” I screamed, attempting to kick the door open. Over our radios I heard his voice though.

‘Smoke bomb. It doesn’t affect me, but it could you. I’m fine.’ His words sounded out. From the other side of the door, I heard the enemies go down one by one.

“Cap, get out of there! You don’t know what kind of chemicals they used!” I was terrified that it might be poison. I needed him out. When he finally emerged, Bruce had found the information we needed and the three of us rushed back to the Tower where I made Steve get checked. There seemed to be no ill-effects of the smoke bomb.

~~


	3. The Shocking Development

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something was in the smoke bomb. Something... dubious. Perhaps the potential drug was for "client performance" after all.

~~

_Avengers Tower 1400_

How we made it back in one piece was beyond me. I didn’t even have to take that many shots for either of my teammates. Bruce and I got Cap to the infirmary where he had a shower and was assessed by the Doc. He found nothing that indicated that he was in any kind of danger. He took blood samples, a urine sample, even plucked a hair from the man’s head to test for any known chemical. But they were all negative for anything.

Bruce had gone to his lab to study the information he had found. He said that he had recognized some of the chemicals, but not all of them. He wanted to know what they were doing and how they were altering the chemicals. I just nodded, wanting to stay to make sure Cap was okay.

As he stepped into one of the recovery rooms to get dressed, I sighed to myself, _‘Well Steve, you did it again. Gave me a heart attack in the field.’_

I felt one of the bullets from earlier start to fully surface, finally. But this one hurt. It was on my sternum. I must have grunted louder than anticipated because Steve rushed out of the room with only his pants on. When he saw that it was my body’s healing that was the source of my pain, he gently held my shoulders to reassure me he was there. I gripped his arm as the bullet finally exited my body and my skin was able to knit back together.

“Better?” He asked with a smile.

I blushed in return, “Your hugs always make me feel better.” It was only then that I saw that his eyes were looking at my attire. He was staring at the green lace teddy. I had long since shrugged out of the uncomfortable blazer. So, it was just the teddy and the skirt now. I had chucked the heels in the corner of the room with the damn blazer. “Cap?” I asked out of concern. Was he… checking me out?

He cleared his throat as if to bring him back to the present, “You look really good.” He leaned in closer and repeated himself, “Really good, Rawlins.”

His hand began reaching up to cup my face. I was speechless. But thankfully the Doc came back announcing he wanted to run another test before Steve could go. That gave me an out and I rushed back to my room. I had gotten a compliment from Steve Rogers and was unsure how to handle life at that moment.

~~

_Morgan’s Room, 1800_

I had showered and taken care of some… primal needs. I had decided to stay in my room for the rest of the day. There was no reason for me to interact anymore with anyone for the day. If I ran into Steve one more time, I think I may just blurt out how I feel and ask him to fuck me silly. That wouldn’t be a good thing. It would be a disaster.

A knock to my door, however, at 6 pm pulled me from my mental turmoil. I stood and, against my better judgement, opened the door without even asking who it was. My eyes were met with the sight of Captain America holding my blazer and stilettos out for me. “You left these in the infirmary, Rawlins.”

“Uh, thanks.” I said as I took them from his outstretched hands. I suddenly felt rather underdressed in my baggy ripped t-shirt and shorts that were pretty close to being threadbare due to how old they were. “I think I’m gonna call it a night. Today wiped me out, ya know?”

He nodded. With a smile he said, “Sweet dreams then, Rawlins.” And then began walking towards the elevator.

~~

_Avengers Tower, 2350_

I never slept well after missions. Typically, my body was still stitching together internally the night after a mission, so I would either walk the floors of the Tower to ensure the team was sleeping, or I would sit on the balcony of the tower and watch the city. Tonight was no different. I was walking the halls, listening for the soft snores that gave away those that were sleeping. Each level was exactly as it should be: filled with sleeping Avengers.

I made my way to the kitchen to make a cup of tea for my ritual of sitting on the balcony to watch the city. As I picked my choice of tea, I heard footsteps. They weren’t Pepper’s or Nat’s. They were too wide to be Bruce’s and to short to be Thor’s. They weren’t cocky enough to be Tony’s. That left Captain America.

The footsteps were revealed to be Steve. He looked tired, as if he hadn’t slept, or slept fitfully. The next thing I noticed was that he didn’t seem to hear me when I said hello to him. So, I tried again, “Hey there Cap. Normally I’m the only night owl after a mission.”

He looked up at me, but what I saw was shocking. His pupils were blown, and the look of utter lust was on his face. I stepped back, only to realize that the kitchen was a U-shape, with no way out behind me. There was only a counter, which my lower back had just touched.

_“Cap, get out of there! You don’t know what kind of chemicals they used!” I was terrified that it might be poison or something. I needed him out._

I was expecting him to say, ‘Good evening Agent’ or maybe ‘what are you doing up Rawlins?’ But he didn’t say anything like that. He took a step towards me with hunger in his eyes as he said, “Do you know what it does to me? You walking around in something like that?” He motioned to my ripped t-shirt and shorts.

“Cap, you don’t sound like yourself. You should go sleep it off.” I said, attempting to sound firm. Truth was I was terrified. He was always so formal with me. Even after living in the tower and being on the same team for 2 years he was still formal with me. He only ever treated me with respect and referred to me as Agent or Rawlins, my last name.

“Morgan, you drive me crazy when you waltz around like this.” He almost purred out. Wait! When did he close distance? He was right in front of me now. His hands rested on the counter behind me, blocking me in. “And earlier, when you rushed to help me. It was everything I could do not to do something about it right then. You looked delicious in that green lace.”

Delicious? Wait, did he use my name? Did he just call me by my given name? My brain couldn’t process what was going on. His body was giving off so much heat that I was beginning to heat up too. Or was it the fact that he was being outrageously attractive right now? But that wasn’t Steve. He didn’t do stuff like this and he certainly didn’t use my given name. Something was making him do this.

“Cap, something’s wrong. We need to get you to the infirmary.” I stated as I pressed a hand on his chest, trying to gain some sort of distance between us. That turned out to be a mistake.

One of his hands moved and caught my wrist, holding firmly, as he said, “Tell me, do the men you allow in your bed call you Morgan?” He moved so his lips were next to my ear, “Or do they call you something else?” His body pressed against me now, revealing that he was rather aroused at that moment, “Baby, sweetie,” he paused and gently nipped my earlobe, “or something dirtier?”

I gulped. Something wasn’t right. _‘The smoke bomb. It wasn’t a poison! It was some sort of aphrodisiac. What kind of freak uses an aphrodisiac as a deterrent for intruders?’_ “Cap, that smoke bomb did something to you. Let’s get you to the infirmary. The Doc can help.”

He pressed his body hard into mine, painfully forcing my back against the counter, “Morgan, don’t tell me you don’t feel anything for me.” His hand let go of my wrist so he could grip my hips with both his hands. In a fluid motion I was hoisted on the counter with his body between my legs. “I never said anything, assuming someone like you would never be interested in someone like me.” He paused as he ground our hips together, due to the newfound ease of contact with our new position. The friction felt great, but it wasn’t right. He purred into my ear, “I’ve wanted to do this for months.”

“Cap, stop. Something isn’t right with you. I’m worried.” I tried to be the voice of reason. I needed to find a way to snap him from whatever trance he was in. He would never be coming onto me like this if he weren’t under some sort of influence.

His right arm snaked around my torso, pulling me flush against his body. His left hand took hold of the back of my head to tilt it to the side. His lips pressed ever so slightly against my neck, “But now, I don’t want to wait anymore. I don’t want to hide how I feel anymore.” Then he began to kiss my neck, the nip and bite, then suck. It felt amazing. But Steve wasn’t in his right mind. Clearly.

I reached as quietly as I could for the nearest object for an offensive attack. I managed to take hold of a potato masher. It would have to do. I moved my free hand up to his hair to grip. He took it as a signal to continue. In no time his hands were gripping the waistband of my shorts. That was my opening. I swung as hard as I could from my confined position. The masher collided with his temple, sending him off kilter.

It wasn’t enough though. I only got just outside the kitchen when he caught my arm and pinned me against his body. My back seemed shaped perfectly to be engulfed by his front. I could feel his arousal pressing into my back as he began roaming his hands over my body. God, it felt amazing. His hands felt all over me, one slipping beneath my shirt to gain better access to my skin. My own hormones were kicking in. He had said he had been waiting to do this for months… _‘NO! He doesn’t realize what he’s doing!’_ I blinked away the cloudiness the hormones were causing to my vision and did the only thing I could think of, I lifted my heel up and dug it down Steve’s shin. I repeated the action two more times, which finally made him stagger back from me. Releasing his hold completely.

That was all I needed to burst into an all-out sprint. I wasn’t sure where I was going, but anywhere was better than letting a man that was out of his mind do whatever he wanted with me. Though I had no objection to that, if he wasn’t being controlled by something. The sound of even faster footsteps than mine began to close in. We were making quite the noise. But no one else was on this level! I had no one to save me. If I could make it to the stairwell I could jump down to the next level and hopefully gain enough distance to hide.

He was on my heels, almost able to grab me, by the time I turned the corner towards the stairwell. The elevator dinged just in time for the newcomer to see my hopeful face turn to utter fear as Steve’s hand caught hold of my hair and yanked back. Then, with just as much force, he shoved my body against the wall – causing my head to smack the wall and my vision to black out for a second.

“STEVE!” Yelled Sam, the newcomer to the level we were on. He pulled Steve off me and put him in a headlock. Without proper blood flow Steve passed out in a matter of seconds. I crumpled to the ground, hair a mess, neck showing signs of a hickey, and other obvious signs of a physical assault like the fact my shirt was ripped open. When had it been ripped? I couldn’t remember, but it was ripped nearly completely open. I held it shut over my chest with one hand as soon as I noticed that Sam noticed.

“The smoke bomb did something to him. We need to get him to the infirmary.” I said, though I knew it was with a trembling small voice. There was no way I was hiding the fact that I was acutely aware that if Sam hadn’t showed up I wouldn’t have been able to stop Steve.

He assessed the woman before him and asked the question that broke both our hearts, “Did he… hurt you?” He meant something worse. We both knew it. But it wasn’t right asking that question in reference to Steve. He wasn’t that kind of man.

I shook my head, “No, you showed up before… it got there.” I stood, a bit wobbly, but I managed.

Sam nodded, “I’ll get him to the infirmary. Do you feel safe going to your room by yourself?” The elevator dinged again, signaling someone else was arriving. There wasn’t time to get Steve off the floor and out of sight – same for me – before the doors opened. This time it was Bucky.

“What the hell did you do to Steve?” He shot at Sam as he stepped out of the elevator. But his eyes took in the sight of me, slightly trembling still from the adrenaline, shirt ripped open, and the man’s concern shifted, “What did you do to Mo?”

I had grown to be close with Bucky. In the past 2 years we had become such close friends we had really no boundaries between each other. Which made my reaction to him stepping towards me all the more hurtful. I inhaled sharply and stepped back, bumping into the wall behind me. I hadn’t meant to do that. But the thought of another man with strength so much greater than my own near me frightened me.

Sam interjected, “Look, I need help getting Steve to the infirmary. Something’s messing with him. It made him hurt Morgan.”

I spoke up, adding to what Sam had said, “Yeah, something was in that smoke bomb he got caught in today. Doc needs to run some tests to make sure he’s okay.” Bucky knew something else happened, but he didn’t push. Thankfully. He just helped pick Steve up and with Sam walked to the elevator. I stayed put, muttering I would go to my room to change before heading to the infirmary.

The doors shut and off the elevator went to the medical floor. I was left in the hallway trembling and alone with the fresh memories of what had almost happened… and what _had_ happened. My fingers gently touched the spot on my neck that Steve had kissed and bit. The flesh was warm there, clearly a bruise had been left. The feeling of his hands on my hips… grabbing at my waistband to pull my shorts down… his deep voice asking what the men that have touched me call me…

At some point in my reverie, I had made it to the elevator, to my floor, into my room, and in my bathroom. Once I was aware of my surroundings the thought that Steve Rogers, Captain America, had almost had his way with me hit and my stomach churned. I dropped to my knees, flipped up the toilet seat, and emptied the contents of my stomach into the bowl.

As I flushed, I remember my vision had blacked out for a moment in the hallway. _‘Great, and I just puked. I could have a concussion.’_ I needed some tests run on me as well. I scrounged my closet for a turtleneck and a pair of pants. Anything to hide the bruises that were surfacing from Steve’s rather harsh grasp from earlier. He hadn’t been in his right mind, almost as if someone else was controlling him. Or maybe it had been someone else entirely. When he came to, if he was better, he may not even remember what he did. I didn’t want to guilt him for something he couldn’t control.

One long look in the mirror for any possible visible sign of attack, and finding none, I headed for the infirmary. I needed to ask the doc to run tests off the books for me. I didn’t want anything coming to light about this.

~~


	4. The Ending, For Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For now, things were as they should.

~~

_Dawn, Medical Floor_

I was sitting in the Doc’s office, going over the results of the tests he had run for me. I had a concussion alright. And the bruises were fresh and at the surface now. Thankfully I had the turtleneck covering the hickey Steve left.

“Now Morgan, you said he didn’t seem himself. But he did use your name. So, he recognized you.” The Doc reasoned.

I nodded, “Yeah, he recognized me.” I remembered what he had said that he didn’t want to wait anymore. Wait for what? Had he been waiting to tell me he liked me? Or that he just wanted to fuck me?

“The tests I ran on his clothes from the mission brought back interesting results. Once inhaled, I suspect the substance isn’t traceable. But the residue on his clothes was enough to confirm your suspicion. There was a rather powerful aphrodisiac in the smoke bomb. It’s been chemically altered to have quite severe aftereffects.” He paused, noting that my arms began to wrap around me for protection. “Morgan, exactly how far did Steve get?”

I frowned, eyebrows lowering, “Not that far. I got away before anything happened, okay? He’s not a bad guy. That stuff made him do it. He was out of his mind, Doc. It wasn’t him.”

His expression was soft and understanding, “I know Morgan. He isn’t my only patient, you know. All of the Avengers are my patients. You are an Avenger. I’m making sure you are okay too. Other than your concussion from being thrown into the wall, I need to know if you were hurt or assaulted any further.”

I looked to the side, completely vulnerable in the conversation I was having, and pulled the turtleneck down to reveal my neck, “I wacked him with a potato masher after this and ran. He caught up and threw me into the wall.”

The Doc inhaled sharply and said, “Morgan, you told me when I first met you to just be blunt with you. I’m going to be blunt: Psychological effects of a sexual assault, even if penetration did not occur, can be damaging. I suggest you speak to someone about it.”

I nodded as I situated the turtleneck back in place, “Doc, this is confidential right?” He nodded, reassuring what I already knew, “The only effect from last night is the guilt I feel for wanting to let him do what he wanted.” I stood and headed for the door. It was true, I had wanted to be with Steve from the first mission I had ever gone on with him. He was everything that I was attracted to: loyal, strong, honorable, funny, and above all he valued his integrity. I’ve had that flame burning for him for 2 years and last night I could have been sated, yet he wasn’t aware of what he was doing. Clearly. He never would have even thought of that if he weren’t under that smoke bomb’s influence.

“Perhaps, but the physical strength must have frightened you. I am here if you need to talk.” Doc said as he let me go. I nodded my thanks as I exited the office and made a bee line for the door.

“Morgan,” Called Bucky. He stepped from one of the recovery rooms – Steve was probably in that one – and motioned for me to come over, “Hey, Morgan, I wanted to see if you were okay. Steve doesn’t remember anything. Doc said the smoke bomb had some chemical that negatively affected him. He’s gonna be under observation for a few days to make sure it gets out of his system.”

I smiled, thankful that he didn’t remember what happened. He would be ashamed of his actions if he were able to recall them. It was best that he didn’t remember. “Good, it’s good to know he’ll be okay.”

Bucky raised a brow, “You were in the Doc’s office for a while. You okay?” He reached out and placed a hand on my shoulder gently. This time I didn’t recoil at the fear of his strength. But I did have to swallow the panic that threated to rise in me.

“Uh, yeah. Cap knocked me into the wall when I tried to get him to the infirmary last night. Gave me a concussion. No big deal. Doc gave me pain meds for the throbbing and as long as I don’t throw up again then signs all point to a quick recovery.” I focused on steady breathing when Bucky gave me the softest of hugs, being very mindful of my head. Damn Doc was right. I was having a hard time already after last night.

~~

_Two Days Later_

I had avoided every male on the team for two days. I was working on the guilt I felt for enjoying what Steve did while under the affects of the smoke bomb. I felt afraid of just how helpless I would have been if Sam hadn’t shown up. I felt sad that I was making Bucky upset with my avoidance of him too. I had spoken with the Doc and even agreed to see the Therapist he suggested. She did video calls, which was helpful. But I was no where near ready to face any of my insanely strong male teammates yet. I had a good excuse of having a headache from the concussion for now. But soon that wasn’t going to cut it.

But what about that night frightened me? Was it the fact I couldn’t have stopped him? OR was it the fact I, deep down, hadn’t **wanted** to stop him. I wanted him to have his way with me on the kitchen counter.

With a sigh of frustration as I looked in the mirror in my bathroom, “You aren’t fooling anyone Mo. You didn’t want to stop him. Everything in you wanted to let him do what he wanted.” Even though it wouldn’t have been what Steve wanted. No, his actions were dictated by the aphrodisiac. That was all.

A knock on my door startled me, though it was a soft tap. Whoever it was had kept my concussion in mind when knocking. Two days was long enough to stay away from everyone. Wallowing in self-pity wasn’t doing me any good. So, I walked to the door and flung it open. It was Bucky. He looked hurt and helpless.

“Bucky? What happened?” I instantly hugged him. I didn’t know what happened but knew that a hug would help comfort him.

When we parted it donned on me that I hadn’t put anything on to cover the hickey on my neck. He tilted my head to the side with a finger gently placed under my chin. The man inhaled sharply, “Steve told me what really happened that night.” He then hugged me, tight. “He’s broken, Mo. Thinks you hate him.”

Something fell in place as he hugged me. I wasn’t afraid, I felt safe. His strength didn’t frighten me. From my place in the safety of his arms, I admitted, “I can’t hate him. I love him.” After a minute or two in the safety of Bucky’s hug, I added, “He wasn’t in his right mind. I know he would never do that.”

“He’s in a bad state. It might be just what he needs, you visiting him. And who knows, maybe it’s what you need too.” Bucky said. He felt me panic and as a result he locked eyes with me, “I’ll be right there. If anything you don’t like happens, I’ll kick his ass.” He kissed my forehead and, only after I nodded in agreeance, he put his arm around my shoulders as we walked to the elevator.

We were quiet as we walked to Steve’s room. _‘What the hell are you thinking, Mo? What are you going to say? That it’s cool because I want you to rail me? That’s not gonna be helpful.’_ Soon enough it was just Bucky and me standing in front of Steve’s door.

Bucky gave a nervous look to me, silently asking if I was okay with going in there. I entered the room, knowing I had Bucky willing to bust into the room and whisk me to safety if I needed it. I closed the door but did not lock it.

The sight before me was shocking, to say the least. Steve was standing, facing the window, and drenched in sweat. His hair was disheveled, and it looked like he was upset. My worry grew, what was wrong with him?

“Captain?” I asked, hoping to get his attention gently.

His shoulders raised, but he did not look at me, just kept looking out the window, “I hurt you. I crossed the line.”

“Bucky said you remembered.” I stated. There was no doubt. He remembered how close he had been to forcing himself on me. He remembered his hands grabbing my hips and setting me on the counter. He remembered blocking me against the counter in the kitchen. He remembered it all.

His back was still to me, as if he were refusing to look at me. Maybe it was out of fear of what he would do, or maybe it was out of shame, but I didn’t like it. He had never been unable to look at me. We had always been able to be easy with one another. He kept me at arm’s length, sure. But that made sense. We were a team of soldiers, essentially. Feelings would make things too difficult in the field.

He leaned against the large windowsill, his body seemed to be fighting him. But he was still in control. Or so I thought. “I can’t offer enough apologies to make up for what I did. I betrayed your trust.” His muscles flexed in his back. I could see his shoulders tense as well. He was struggling with the effects of the smoke bomb even now.

“Captain, you weren’t yourself. I understand.” I started to close distance, walking around the bed towards the same windowsill he was at. He held a hand up, though. I stopped in my tracks at the end of the bed. “Cap, don’t shut me out, please. I’m not upset. **You** didn’t cross any line. You weren’t in your right mind. Please don’t shut me out.”

His jaw clenched as he answered back, “It’s not safe for you to be near me. Doc doesn’t know what sparked my… reaction the other night.”

The way he was afraid of being near me upset me. I refused to let some sick weirdo and their fucking smoke bomb of sex get in the way of me and my goddamn friend. My extremely attractive, very appealing friend. I closed distance and with a hand on his bicep I spun him to face me. When I did so, I learned why he had been faced away. He was still hard. I couldn’t help but look at it, I mean… it was rather impressive. Prying my eyes away from his erection, I asked, “Have you been…”

“Yes.” He answered quickly as he looked away. His hands moving to cover himself. “It comes and goes, but… this time is more persistent.”

“Comes and goes. Has this one lasted lo…”

“Yes.” He gritted out. With his eyes closed, from embarrassment I was sure, he explained, “Doc thinks the chemical manipulation of the aphrodisiac is to prolong the erection. Because of the serum it’s staying in my system longer. But…” He began to falter. It was like he was desperate. “Nothing is making it go away.”

I watched him with an incredulous look as he sat on the edge of the bed. He was desperate and uncomfortable – wildly uncomfortable I would wager. My mind, the analytical thing it was, realized that for how many hours he had been stuck with an erection meant he could be facing nerve damage soon. My cheeks burned hot as I asked, “Have you tried certain activities? Such as the usual way a man would solve this problem.”

I watched as Steve nodded his head, absolutely refusing to look at me. “Yes, it didn’t work.”

Now my whole face was red, “Were you able to… finish?”

He was burning bright red now too. He grunted in frustration and ripped his shirt off, revealing toned and tense muscle covered in a sheen of sweat. “Yes. I was able to… what you said.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat as I ventured further, “Was it just you?”

This time he did look at me, his eyes showing how shocked he was at my question. He was looking at my neck where he had bit me, “After what I did to you, I don’t trust myself with any woman. You shouldn’t even be here.” His eyes flashed a look of lust before he looked to the floor.

“You called me Morgan last night.” I said, knowing my body had made the decision for me as I walked towards the man before me. He looked at me and, only once I saw his utter fear fade to a worried curiosity did I continue, “You never call me by my given name.” I reached him, used my knee to nudge his legs apart, and stepped between his legs. My hands cupped his face, “You always call me Agent or Rawlins. You’ve never called me by my given name.” I leaned forward and pressed our cheeks together so I could whisper in his ear, “Then, when you asked what men call me. The men that I invite to my bed.”

His hands came up to hold my hips, the tremble in them betrayed the fear he felt. I could tell he was aroused, and I could tell he was struggling with the smoke bomb effects. But this time he wasn’t gone. This time Steve was Steve.

“M-Morgan, I don’t think this is wise.” He tried to push me away. I just held on so I could position myself on his lap. “We don’t know what I could do to you. Please stop this.”

I locked our eyes and firmly asked, “Do you really want me to stop? If the answer is yes, I will.” I wanted him to just take me. I wanted to take him up on his offer from the other night. As I sat on his lap, waiting for his response, I could feel his erection pressing up against me. I wanted to move, grind my hips – just like he had that night – but I stayed still.

Steve let out a sigh and with a level of vulnerability I hadn’t ever seen him exhibit, he said, “You don’t have to do this. You shouldn’t ever have to see me again. Not after what I did.” His hand reached up and gently tugged the turtleneck out of the way. The bruise he had left was there for him to see. “I violated your trust and nearly…” He just sighed.

I smirked, knowing that he wouldn’t lie. Given that, it followed that he did want me. So, it was true what he said that night. He didn’t want to wait anymore. He wanted me. That was enough for me. I started to grind my hips against him as I whispered into his ear, “That’s not a no, Captain. And if your erection persists for much longer, you could have nerve damage.” I slowly and deliberately trailed kisses down his jawline. I wanted him to go crazy with the contact.

In a near animalistic reaction, Steve flipped us so I was flat on his bed, my legs spread wide as he pressed into my body. His eyes were blown with lust, but I could still see him. Steve was still there. He held both my wrists in one hand above my head as he locked our eyes, “Morgan, I have been attracted to you for a long time now. I’ve cared for you for a long time. But it wasn’t until recently that I realized I love you.” He released my wrists as he pressed our foreheads together, “But I cannot do this to you. I’m sorry for making you feel like you have to do this for me.”

What the fuck was he saying? Was he actually trying to talk me out of this? He began removing his body from mine and it was clear he was going to choose suffering in pain with an erection that wouldn’t go away instead of fucking me to see if it would go down after. “You are so incredibly thick sometimes, Cap.” My legs wrapped around his torso, stopping him from getting off of me. With my newly freed hands I held his face, “I don’t feel like I have to offer myself to you. I want to. I have been attracted to you for a long time. I have cared for you for a long time. And, Steve,” I took note of the way his eyes sparkled at me using his given name, “I have loved you for a long time.”

That seemed to reinvigorate him, opened him up to letting the lust take over. His pupils were once again blown with lust as his lips descended upon me as if he truly meant to devour me. In no time he was shedding my clothing off, intent on loving every inch of me.

“This time, no pain.” He promised, “I’ll make up for that night.” He kissed every inch of skin he could find. He was so sweet with how attentive he was, but still forceful. I was beginning to lose the fear that had tried to take over. The fear of the strength that this man possessed. It was gone, obliterated. And now, he was showing me just how gentle he was.

When we were nearly naked, he paused, his eyes holding a new fear as he asked, “Morgan, I need to know you want this.”

I nodded, tears pricking at my lashed, “I want this Steve. I want you.” I bucked my hips up into his and added, “Now take me, please.”

He smirked and actually ripped my pants and panties off of me, “How could I deny such a pretty lady what she wants?” His hand slid down between my legs, eliciting a loud moan from me. I suppose too loud, because the door burst open at that very moment.

I saw Bucky, with rather shocked eyes, in the doorway. I couldn’t help but smile, “It’s alright. I started it this time!” Bucky just chuckled and left us to it.

He didn’t lie. He was being gentle and attentive. Each touch, each kiss, each thrust was filled with a tender care that I had never experienced before. He held me close and whispered the sweetest of things in my ear. Steve took a special care of the hickey on my neck. He gently kissed the bruised skin. He gently placed kisses over every bruise I had, as if he meant to gently kiss the marks away.

He didn’t let me do anything. Each time I attempted to reciprocate he would stop me and say, “This is about you. Next time, sweetheart, next time.”

~~

_That Night_

The room was a mess. The bed sheets were ruined. The desk had only one leg that wasn’t broken. The windowsill was our favorite spot, but one of the panes was cracked now. The smoke bomb had quite the lasting effect. But eventually, Steve’s soldier was off duty. We just reclined on the sill, me in his arms comfortably. His fingers running up and down my spine as we enjoyed the aftermath. I would be sore for a while, but I was 100% convinced it was worth it.

“What do we do now?” He asked, breaking the blissful silence we had. We needed to talk about it, understandably. Would we be able to go on missions together now? Would we endanger our team by being in the field at the same time? There were too many unknowns now. Not to mention the fact I wasn’t sure how long I would live, but Steve was a normal human – sans his strength – now that he was out of the ice.

“We decide, definitively, what we are to each other.” I offered, “After that we talk about mission status for us both. Then we tell everyone else.” I rested a hand on his chest, relishing in the contact. If he decided it would be too complicated, I would request a transfer to a team elsewhere. I wouldn’t force him to watch his decision live life without him. And I couldn’t possibly watch him move one either.

“I know you’re worried about how much time we have together.” He said softly, his arms keeping me close to him. He kissed my temple and said, “I know you chose to not be involved with anyone because of your ability. Just know I will be forever grateful for whatever time I have with you.” I knew he meant it, truly. And I would, if he allowed, be with him to the end of whatever was growing between us.

I snuggled further into his hold and just sighed. I was content and happy. Whatever heartache that was to come was decades away. I knew he was smiling as we settle in to watch the city through his now cracked window. The future could wait. For now, we were happy in the moment.

~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all!
> 
> Thank you for reading. Please leave a comment to let me know what you thought! I love those!  
> And, just in case you were wondering, yes I did look up negative side effects of a prolonged erection. It is called priapism and yes, that was hard to explain to my partner why I was looking that up! 
> 
> Love,  
> Luna


End file.
